Doorbell woke me.  Hours ago. 

Posted on September 17, 2001 by joe

Doorbell woke me.  Hours ago.  It was Bobby the cab driver, not Bobby the one I love.  Funny, it interrupted a dream of Bobby the one I love:. 

He was standing in the sun, turning as if he had just started to walk away, or as if something behind him had drawn his attention away from me.  His hair was not the usual light brown, thinning and receding slightly.  His hair in the dream was thick and long, it was so bright it looked white, even luminous.  His body was the same as in real life, trim and muscled, sexy.  But even that seemed different; his skin had more than just the usual warm glowing tan.  It seemed brighter, too, in a way, and more precious, more valuable — like gold that had turned to platinum. 

Before answering the door, while stumbling around still half-asleep, I thought maybe the dream was a premonition; I thought that maybe it would be Bobby at the door, the one I love. 

It was the cab driver.  He’d shaved his head since the last time I saw him.  “Today’s not a good day,” I croaked, my eyes still squinty with sleep.  Bobby the cab driver comes when he wants to fuck.  We suck and lick — never kiss — and he bends me over and pumps it in.  Then he leaves.  Quick simple sex.  He’s the same age as Bobby the one I love (31), but he’s not half as cute, and not near as sexy.  Later on, when I’m horny, I’ll think, “Why the hell did I let him go?  Why didn’t I just let him do me?  Jeesh.”. 

I dreamt of Bobby the one I love the night before last as well.  In that dream his naked, lanky, sleeping body was suspended just slightly above my head and to my left in the branches of a tree; his limbs were splayed out in a random though comfortable pose, his face and pelvis were both turned away from me, concealing their details.  I thought, “He is peaceful there, I should not disturb him.”.  The tree was in the city. 

When I woke I had to wonder why I saw him in a tree; one never wonders these things while dreaming them.  It seemed as if he had fallen from a great height and, caught by the branches of a tree, was uninjured and peacefully asleep.  But for some reason that made me very sad, I was not allowed to touch him. 

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